Relationship Spread

Hi everybody

I've seen at Chanah's site a wonderful explanation about this spread. I have a friend that knows someone but she's not sure what are his feelings towards her. He doesn't open up and also doesn't make major movements in relation to their relationship.

Here are the cards:


............................................

.............. .............................

OBS: In my cards both the man and the woman look the other way around.

Woman:
Above card: her thoughts and plans - Cross - obviously she's suffering with his attitude and the way he (doesn't) acts towards their relationship;
Down card: her feelings - Stars - she wants to have a good and successful relationship with him;
Left card: her hopes and desires - Dog - she would like to have in him a loyal and trusthful partner or at least that they could be good friends;
Right card: the qualities she shows in this relationship - Rider - she's open to this relationship and she's willing he will come with news and actions.

Man:
Above card: his thoughts and plans - Garden - I'm a little bit confused here. I think he likes to feel free and not attached to anybody (but this card also represents party, wedding, etc)... hummm...;
Down card: his feelings - Scythe - well, I think he cuts any kind of involvement in his life, like he uses the Scythe to protect himself;
Right card: his hopes and desires - Key - hummm ... is this card confirming that at the moment he wants to stay alone OR would this mean he wants to be with her?
Left card: the qualities he shows in this relationship - Storks - changes. I think he's struggling inside himself. He wants to change but he holds himself back for some reason.

The sum of her cards - 36+18+1+16=71-36=35 - she will bring (and wants) stability with this relationship;

The sum of his cards - 20+33+17+10= 80-36=44-36=8 - ohhh... It seems that he won't make a movement here ...

The sum of both cards (outcome) - 35+8=44-36=8 again - I don't think this will come to a positive and fruitful relationship.

OBS: In her site Chanah adds up the numers of the result to come to a card number among the 36 cards of Lenormand. I prefer to reduce 36 to get a card number instead.

Any other thoughts? This is not a spread I'm quite used to do so I really would appreciate some insight here.
Thanks a lot!
Stanze

I think you did a great job with this, especially the Lady. Here are my comments.

Right card: the qualities she shows in this relationship - Rider - she's open to this relationship and she's willing he will come with news and actions.

I wasn't sure about this one; I would see this as her showing more active qualities in the relationship. Like she is working at it, or being very open and communicative, always trying to move things forward.

Above card: his thoughts and plans - Garden - I'm a
little bit confused here. I think he likes to feel free and not
attached to anybody (but this card also represents party, wedding,
etc)... hummm...;

I would have to go with the spirit of your first sentence about freedom; his thoughts and plans revolve around social activity, which is more likely about going out socially, and possibly playing the field. (Seems like a good expression for this card!)

Down card: his feelings - Scythe - well, I think he cuts any kind of involvement in his life, like he uses the Scythe to protect himself;

I like your take on that. Alternatively, his feelings could be very "sharp" and intense; I could see this meaning that they go to extremes where he could be very passionate, but suddenly cut off and change for a different extreme.

Right card: his hopes and desires - Key - hummm ... is this card confirming that at the moment he wants to stay alone OR would this mean he wants to be with her?

Since you're asking about a relationship with this spread, and the Key card is often one of success and unlocking the door, I would say it means he wants the relationship to be successful. Whatever his definition of success is.

I agree with your Stork comments... he's trying to change. Perhaps the idea of an ongoing relationship is hard for him?

I also agree with your sums. From all this I feel the Lady is ready and willing to work at a relationship; the Man is really having some difficulty with it because he's not used to only having one, and he might be fickle. But he's trying! From your outcome cards, it doesn't seem like he's going to be able to overcome his reticence though.

Hi rif

Thanks for your comments. I was also thinking about your meaning for the Scythe in combination with the Storks. The changing process he lives with... in the relationship could mean that he changes all the time.

What do you think?

Stanze

That could certainly be the case.

Yes, he could make changes all the time. But why? If it's because he cuts off his feelings (whether or not they are "sudden" which I impact as extreme in this case), it doesn't sound like a good thing.

I just didn't get a good feel for his side, and that's mostly because of the Scythe. I know Storks are usually supposed to bring a good change. Garden would seem positive, except it still makes me wonder if he prefers being available to a lot of people rather than just one, in it's position.

That's exactly the feeling I had, rif, regarding him and the garden, mainly!

Thanks for sharing knowledge here!
Stanze

I'm always happy to share!

Hi Stanze,

I get the feeling that he wants a successful relationship, but has emotional blocks and fears that he is trying to change and cut through. I agree that this will probably not be a fruitful relationship. Hard to tell why he has these issues to work through. Maybe he had a horrible relationship experience and is just being skittish?

Just my 2 cents,
Cateye

Stanze i agree with everyones interpretations.

The key explanation sounded good.

;-)

cateye wrote:Hi Stanze,

I get the feeling that he wants a successful relationship, but has emotional blocks and fears that he is trying to change and cut through. I agree that this will probably not be a fruitful relationship. Hard to tell why he has these issues to work through. Maybe he had a horrible relationship experience and is just being skittish?

Just my 2 cents,
Cateye

Hi cateye

Thanks for sharing your thoughts here. I don't know about his or even her past. This is a reading I've made for a friend through e-mail so I don't know their story together and my analysis was purely based on the cards but I'll pass this option to her.

Thanks!
Stanze

Hi krys

Thanks as well for reading it!!!!
Stanze

Hi everybody

Since the PC and LN spreads showed that X has interesse in my friend, I've decided to do this Cross Spread to her and X.
............ ............................
....
............ ............................

Wow... some interesting situation here.

Woman:
Above card: her thoughts and plans - Flowers - she wants this relationship to be good and nice;
Down card: her feelings - Snake - maybe she's feeling things are not going the way she thought, I mean, on a strainght line. Or maybe she thinks there's someone else in between;
Left card: her hopes and desires - Mountain - I got confused here. Maybe this mountain means she wants to be at the top, I mean, go through the obstacles (the fact he has not contacted her) to reach him?;
Right card: the qualities she shows in this relationship - Lilies - she shows the possibility of a family (and also she shows him sensuality).

Man:
Above card: his thoughts and plans - Tree - well as the other cards have shown it seems he is looking for something stable;
Down card: his feelings - Ring - hummmm.... he considers her as someone to be with; or he keeps coming and going on stablished patterns;
Right card: his hopes and desires - Dog - I think he's looking for fidelity and loyalty;
Left card: the qualities he shows in this relationship - Stars - gosh... if I tell this to her she would deny... how he shows up as stars if he doesn't approach? Well, maybe she sees him like this...

The sum of her cards was 67 - 36 = 31 (Sun). Good prospect. This is what she would have.

The sum of his cards was 64 - 36 = 28 (Man). It seems he thinks first in his own benefits (not bad to think like that but someone must be careful).

The sum of both 31 + 28 = 59 - 36 = 23 (Mice). I can't say who's going to lose something OR if adapting one to each other would be stressful and to work out they should be care of small things... it could also be meaning that some small little things are still eating up the possibility of these two be together.

Other thoughts?
Thanks
Stanze

Hi Stanze,

It's nice to see you posting regularly again. You must have missed us too, while you were on holiday!

So X is interested in your friend, but not pursuing her? Is that right?

I think you had reasonable interpretations. I will try to add some different comments, though, to compare and contrast.

Flowers - she hopes for things to be rosy; but is she also secretly hoping for a wedding? (like the bride's bouquet) Or maybe she wants him to invite her to be his date, for some big event in the near future. To get things rolling, so to speak.

Snake - maybe she feels like "the other woman." Does he have any other commitments, or does she suspect any?

Mountain - she hopes not to be alone; or perhaps she likes the challenge of pursuing X, if he seems distant

Lillies - (do they have an active relationship that she shows this quality?) - I agree with sensuality, but she could also be showing calm


Tree - stable seems the only option here

Ring - perhaps he feels stuck in a rut (which is what I think you're saying) - I don't know enough of the situation to say that he feels she's good for a relationship

Dog - I agree with you here

Stars - it could be the negative aspect of the Stars, where his head is stuck up in the clouds

Mice - makes me think that a lot of energy between them is wasted worry about what the other is thinking

rif wrote:Hi Stanze,

It's nice to see you posting regularly again. You must have missed us too, while you were on holiday!

Yes, you know I did... or are you reading it on your own cards????

rif wrote:So X is interested in your friend, but not pursuing her? Is that right?

Well, this is the answer I got from previous spreads. He is interested on her but she will have to be patient because he was still sorting out situations. To be honest I never believed in this "solving issues" talk ... anyway, I hope the best for my friend anyway

rif wrote:I think you had reasonable interpretations. I will try to add some different comments, though, to compare and contrast.

Great, great, great!!! I'm learning!!!!

rif wrote:Flowers - she hopes for things to be rosy; but is she also secretly hoping for a wedding? (like the bride's bouquet) Or maybe she wants him to invite her to be his date, for some big event in the near future. To get things rolling, so to speak.

Yes, she prefers to think/have a stable relationship, even marriage if this is the case, but not obligatory.

rif wrote:Snake - maybe she feels like "the other woman." Does he have any other commitments, or does she suspect any?

She suspects and this matches also with my idea of snake...

rif wrote:Mountain - she hopes not to be alone; or perhaps she likes the challenge of pursuing X, if he seems distant

I liked this idea of "not to hope". I forgot that I also see like this when a bad Tarot card comes from in the Advice position in the Celtic Cross... indeed negative cards should be seen as warning or not wishes when they fall in a so-what positive position (you won't wish anything negative per definition, right?). Thanks!!!

rif wrote:Lillies - (do they have an active relationship that she shows this quality?) - I agree with sensuality, but she could also be showing calm

It makes perfect sense. They don't have an active relationship. It came to my mind the sensuality aspect because the attraction he felt for her. Of course it shouldn't be necessarily a sexual attraction (Gosh... I shouldn't generalize the masculine genre like that ).

rif wrote:Ring - perhaps he feels stuck in a rut (which is what I think you're saying) - I don't know enough of the situation to say that he feels she's good for a relationship.

Yeah, now that you mentioned I do feel the idea of staying in the same place applies better.

rif wrote:Stars - it could be the negative aspect of the Stars, where his head is stuck up in the clouds

This is another idea but I really can't say. She told me he seems to be quite a reasonable person who thinks before acting so... I'm not sure if this meaning would apply. I was following the interpretation in the No-Layout (Interesse) I've done for her.

Thanks a lot, rif!!!!!
Stanze

Hi Stanze

Just curious, is your first Relationship spread and question, you posted above, about the same two people as the second layout?

Yep, midnight. I forgot to mention this. I've used the same spread to see the evolution (or not) of their situation.

Stanze